Archive for October, 2008

National October Awareness Month.

October 15, 2008


October. Duh.

This month is “National October Awareness Month.”  We are celebrating over two thousand years of Octobers.  It comes as one of the longer Months for 31 days out of 365.  Yes, to you month with two Os, to you we become aware.  Autumn would never continue without October.  Thank God we have October because without it, we would be left with 11 months, that’d be a bitch!

Without October, these months: Adopt a Shelter Dog Month, Antidepressant Death Awareness Month, (World) Blindness Awareness Month, Celiac Disease Awareness Month, Celebrate the Bilingual Child Month, Children’s Magazine Month, Christmas Seal Campaign Month, Church Library Month, Church Safety and Security Month, Class Reunion Month, Co-op Month, Domestic Violence Month, Dyslexia Month, Eat Better & Eat Together Month, Emotional Intelligence Month, Emotional Wellness Month, Energy Management is a Family Affair-Improve Your Home Month (long one), Gay & Lesbian History Month, German-American Heritage Month, Global Diversity Awareness Month, Go Hog Wild – Eat Country Ham Month, Halloween Safety Month, Head Start Awareness Month, Health Literacy Month, International Starman Month, International Strategic Planning Month, Long Term Care Planning Month, Lupus Awareness Month, Month of Free Thought Month, National Animal Safety and Protection Month, National Bake and Decorate Month, National Breast Cancer Awareness Month, National Caramel Month, National Chili, National Chiropractic, National Crime Prevention, National Cyber Security Awareness, National Dental Hygiene Month, National Depression Education & Awareness Month, National Disability Employment Awareness Month, National Domestic Violence Awareness Month, National Down Syndrome Month, National Ergonomics Month, National Family Sexuality Education Month, National “Gain the Inside Advantage” Month, National Go On A Field Trip Month, National Kitchen & Bath Month, National Liver Awareness Month, National Medical Librarian Month, National Orthodontic Health Month, National Physical Therapy Month, National Popcorn Poppin’ Month, National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, National Reading Group Month, National Roller Skating Month, National RSV Awareness Month, National Sarcastic Awareness Month, National Spina Bifida Awareness Month, National Window Covering Safety Month, National Work and Family Month, National Sudden Infant Death Syndrome Awareness Month, Organize Your Medical Information Month, Photographer Appreciation Month, Polish American Heritage Month, Positive Attitude Month, Raptor Month, Rett Syndrome Awareness Month, Right Brainers Rule! Month, Self-Promotion Month, Spinach Lovers Month, Squirrel Awareness Month, Stamp Collecting Month, Talk About Prescriptions Month, Vegetarian Month, Wishbones for Pets Month, Women’s Small Business Month, and Workplace Politics Awareness ( would not be months!

October, being a lot of things: A vegetarian ham health better eating caramel sticking to my teeth dental hygiene awareness month or a self-promoting down syndrome gaining the inside advantage month, we can all agree that we all need to be aware of you because without you, where would my “High School Musical 2008” or my “Topless National Breast Cancer Awareness” flip calendar be?  And we want to enrich your awareness of October in October because October is worthwhile and original according to October.  No we are not trying to persuade your views about the other Months by declaring October as National October Awareness Month; we just want to draw attention to the issue.

Without your mischief night and Hollow’s Eve I would not be scared of the neighborhood adolescents or the next door pedophile that puts razor blades in my kid’s candy apple.  Thank You, National October Awareness Month, because without you I would not be aware of October!

In the fine words of Dane Cook about baseball, “There is Only One October!”